Ahh… Graceful Transitions
We all love the feeling of a transition AFTER they are complete, however, the anticipation of change can be terrifying and well frankly, debilitating. Is it possible that you could experience graceful transitions in your life?
Here in Hong Kong we have been repeatedly exposed to the Monsoon Prodrome over the past few weeks. Just before the storm, the sky goes dark, the air gets thick and the pressure is unbearable. As the doctors for many HSE women; I know that many really feel the pressure as headaches and unrest!
This unrest and debilitation – the feeling of being in transition – is what stops you from making the changes you need to make in you life in the first place. You are literally paralyzed by the fear of having to make changes and decisions.
These can be major decisions about your life:
- how you choose to treat others
- what role you take in relationships
- the work you chose
Becoming a mom is one of those super-serious decisions! And it possible for you to experience graceful transitions to motherhood.
There are a few steps you can take to ease the process of transition and create those graceful transitions in your life. When you take the time to acknowledge the changes and losses and create rituals around the process, you can transition with greater ease.
This is my role as a guide to wellness for YOU!
To guide you through the transitions from a feeling of unwell to well. To help you to connect to your wellness. To guide you from tired parent to confident lioness.
In September I am co-hosting a Graceful Transitions event on Lantau at Mui Wo, A Pregnant Pause. An opportunity to create your own Graceful Transitions Ceremony.
Your Five Steps to Transitioning with Greater Ease & Confidence:
Step One – Feel the Discomfort
As we transition from one experience to the next there is a feeling of unrest. This loss of the old and the push to feel and experience something new is challenging and difficult.
Sometimes these loses and changes feel… nearly impossible. You resist and resist and resist any change and decision-making until it is forced upon us. It is as though you have become addicted to the old way of being and feeling.
Even if you know there IS SOMETHING BETTER OUT THERE.
Allow yourself to experience the discomfort, do not run away from the feelings. Sit and experience and identify what you are feeling:
- anger, etc.
Allow these feelings to be experienced in your body. Feel them, recognize the feelings, find out where they are in your body, and move to the next step.
Step Two – Recognize the Loss of the Old
You may find that you begin to ask yourself:
- Why should I have have to change?
- Am I being presumptuous to take my life in my own hands?
- What if I fail and things are worse than before?
- What will other people think of me if I fail? And
- How will I feel about myself if I fail?
Recognize that these feelings are all due to your fear of losing what you have now. Yet, once you make the change in your life, you will have even more opportunities for growth and love and acceptance.
At the moment of childbirth there are so many transitions and losses of old roles:
- a woman becomes a mother
- a man becomes a father, and
- a couple becomes parents.
Give yourself the opportunity to recognize and then accept these losses. Then you are recognize how exciting and expansive your new role will be. This will allow you to move more smoothly and experience graceful transitions into your new role.
Step Three – Take Action and Accept Your New Role
Now you need to take action. Make a commitment and take charge of your life to begin to initiate the change in your life. Say yes to:
- a change in jobs;
- accepting, without condition, love from your friends family;
- get ready for pregnancy; or
- moving house!
When you make a change, you will release your old identity:
- you will no longer be the victim = you will be responsible for your choices and your life
- you will no longer be disorganized; you will be accountable for your lack of commitment
- you will no longer be a immature; you will become aware and fully able to ask for what you need
This may feel frightening and intimidating at first. Yet these new roles offer more freedom and opportunity. You will be able to make more choices about your experience of life. You will be able to feel how you desire to feel.
Step Four – Make a Commitment to Self-Kindness
As you begin to make changes, the most important thing you can do for yourself (and for the world, really) is to be kind to yourself. In order to experience graceful transitions, you need to learn to forgive yourself and move forward.
Be Kind and Compassionate with Yourself
As you begin to transition to your new role, you will find that you slip backwards into your old patterns. You may feel remorse or guilt and shame. Remorse is a tireless and backward emotion.
Instead of remorse, acknowledge your contrition for any errors or falling into old patterns. And let go.
As humans we hold on so tightly to what we already know.
Yet, this what we need to move forwards:
- acknowledge you are ready for change
- accept forgiveness from yourself, and
- let go
As humans we are so attached to our physical body connections on the earth: possessions, identities, roles.
Step Five – Create a Ritual or Celebration for Your Graceful Transitions
We all need to acknowledge these loses and transitions in our lives; working with ritual and celebrations to mark these changes. We can initiate the change with a ritual or celebration around our Graceful Transitions.
This is the Healing that I do with YOU.
To guide you through your graceful transitions from a feeling of unwell to well. From old ways to new. From tired parent to fierce lioness. To help you to connect to your wellness.
To guide you from tired mom to confident lioness
This September I will be cohosting an event to mark the transition from woman to mamabear! See below for more details and tickets. Let your pregnant friends know.
Each month I host New Moon Invocation Ceremonies to allow for the Graceful Transitions
SEPTEMBER PREGNANCY RETREAT IN HONG KONG
In September I will be helping my new pregnant moms in Hong Kong to learn to embrace the role of mother. Although some of you are already excellent mamas, having a newborn around is a completely unique experience.
To ease the TRANSITION I will be co-hosting:
A PREGNANT PAUSE! – Preparing for the Optimal Birth
– (transition from one woman to mama!)
SEPTEMBER 23, 2017
1-5 pm (includes lunch)
Escape the city for a Day Retreat on Lantau
- learn that you need and can request support
- create an intention for your new baby
- move into your new ROLE with ease & grace
Come and Celebrate Your Transition!
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